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Monday, April 11, 2011

Code Word: Annoying

by Melissa Jagears

So my post today is to let you in on a little secret. Your children will annoy you.

Oh, that isn't news to you?

Ok, so it's not that they can annoy you, but I recently stumbled onto the meaning behind why my children getting infuriatingly annoying. It means, "Mommy, I really need you to love on me."

And the more they need my affection, feel neglected, or feel second to whatever I'm giving higher priority to, the more annoying they get. Which just makes me want to tear my hair out because it makes it harder to accomplish whatever it is I'm trying to accomplish.

So, now, if the word "annoying" ever crosses my mind about my child, I'm making a concentrated effort to stop doing whatever it is --chores, work, paying attention to the other child--as soon as possible and give my "annoying" child some one-on-one attention. Not even necessarily a huge chunk of individual time, but definitely a one-on-one-you're-special block of time like coloring a page with them or blowing on their tummy for a few minutes.

And amazingly, the annoying behaviors decrease.

So, from now on, if the word "annoying" pops into my head, I'm using it as a code word for myself--to assess if I've gotten my priorities screwed up and haven't spent enough time with my child.

If your kids are annoying you, I'd challenge you to check your child's love=time meter.